Love

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

-1 Corinthians 13:13

                Lately I’ve been talking a lot about faith. But, just as faith is important, so is love. Faith works through love and that is more important than the law (Galatians 5:5-6). With faith comes true love; not the mere mortal kind but the kind that comes from God. The kind that is willing to make sacrifices, has understanding, and is patient. The love that is humble and not selfish. The love that will do anything to protect and will persevere through hardship.

“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And

we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.”

-1 John 3:16

                God IS love. He set for us an example of what our love should be like. If we do not love God, than we do not know true love. God dwells in those who love and makes them complete. There is no fear in love; rather perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with negative consequences. You cannot claim to love God but then hate someone. How can you not love someone whom you can see but then claim to love what you cannot see? (1 John 4) God loves us so much that He sent His one and only Son so that He may set us free and dwell among us in the New Heaven.

“Better is open rebuke than hidden love.”

-Proverbs 27:5

                Love is so important that the Law can be based upon two commandments: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and love your neighbor as yourself. With love for God comes our faith and trust. With it comes dependence on Him and true repentance. Our love cannot be mere words and talk but must be shown in truth and action (1 John 3:18).

“This love I speak of means that we must live in obedience to God’s commands.

The command, as you have all heard from the beginning, is that you must all live in love.”

-2 John 6

Discipline

            

                  Everyone has heard the saying “spare the rod and spoil the child.” Some people believe it’s from the book of Proverbs. However, it’s neither a Bible verse nor a Biblical principle. It’s like the other non-Biblical verse “the Lord helps those who help themselves” in that it’s quoted by people who know little or nothing about the Bible to elevate certain kinds of behavior from mere human tradition. Biblical ignorance is so pervasive that it even reaches groups of people who should know better. People prefer knowing Biblical passages that reinforce their pre-existing beliefs. They memorize parts of the text that they can put together to prove a Biblical basis for whatever they believe in but they ignore the vast majority of the text. So many who profess a love for the Bible or quote verses have never actually read the book. Some of the most popular fake verses are actually paraphrases of biblical concepts such as “God works in mysterious ways” or “Cleanliness is next to Godliness.” They sound proverbish so people figure it must come from the Bible. But take a closer look and you’ll realize that it’s just a quote coined by a man. What we call these are phantom Bible passages, begun by pure Biblical illiteracy or a goof-up by the speaker that then spreads like wild-fire.

                Some people say “spare the rod and spoil the child” because they believe that without spankings, a relationship is ruined. When and how did spankings originate? It first started as a pagan fertility rite in ancient Greece. Women who were unable to conceive went to the temple of Juno where the priests of the Greek god Pan spanked them with goat hide whips to increase fertility. Spanking is primarily associated with erotica. Later, the Catholic Church used spanking as a means of cleansing women of their sins.  Whether for erotica or punishment, the person being spanked was always an adult and always a willing participant. The notion of spanking children emerged in Victorian times as an expansion of the Catholic tradition of punishment for sin.

                So, with that introduction, what does the Bible say about spanking, or proper discipline?

“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who

loves him is careful to discipline him.”

-Proverbs 13:24

                The Hebrew word for rod in this proverb describes a scepter or staff. A scepter was a large carved staff that was a symbol of tribal authority.  The Hebrew word for rod was used 190 times in the Old Testament and 140 of those times it was translated to tribe. The other 50 times it’s translated as rod, club, shaft, or truncheon.

                This does not mean that God wants a father to beat his son into submission. The word discipline translated from Proverbs 13:24 appears 50 times and 38 of those are translated into instruction or correction, never punish. So, we’re talking about proverbs where things are often symbolic, and the rod symbolizes authority. Proverbs 13:24 should be interpreted as “Whoever fails to exercise his parental authority hates his son, but he who loves him is sure to instruct and correct him” It’s a warning to fathers that as the heads of households, it is their responsibility to instruct and train his children.

“Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with

the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod

and save his soul from death.”

-Proverbs 23:13-14

                This proverb is not giving permission to beat the child. This proverb starts out in a literal reading but then switches to an allegorical interpretation. Death in this context refers to the second death-the spiritual death. Therefore, this verse is saying that if you take responsibility as the father and correct the child, you can save him from spiritual death. To see that not all proverbs are to be taken literally, we can look at Proverbs 23:5. It says “Cast but a glance at riches and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle.” It’s obviously allegorical.

                In Old Testament times, the people knew that the children did not intentionally commit evil actions that had to be beaten out of them. The children were not punished, they were disciplined. The root word of discipline is disciple which means student. It has never meant punishment. That thought that evil had to be beat out of a child came with the Catholic Church and the Victorian era. Hebrew men led by example and instruction to “tame” their children.

“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them

up in training and instruction of the Lord.”

-Ephesians 6:4

                Discipline is still necessary, however. Too many parents these days are too busy being friends with their children instead of instilling good morals. The children aren’t learning the consequences of bad behavior and in turn they are walking down the path that leads to destruction and death.

“Discipline your son, and he will give you peace;

he will bring delight to your soul.”

-Proverbs 29:17

“Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not

be a willing party to his death.”

-Proverbs 19:18

“The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother”

-Proverbs 29:15

                God disciplines His children. God’s discipline upon us is when we have to endure hardship. He is training us, as every righteous father disciplines his own son. If you are not disciplined than you aren’t really a child. Most human fathers discipline their children for a short time as they see fit but God disciplines us for our good so that we can share in His holiness. When disciplined, we have respect and therefore we should submit to God as well. No discipline is enjoyable and it can be painful but it produces righteousness, peace, and honor to those who have been brought up with discipline.

“And you have forgotten the words of encouragement that address you as sons:

‘My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do

not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those

he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”

-Hebrews 12:5

                There are many proverbs that tell us how the wise heed discipline and love knowledge. Those who hate correction are not wise and lead others astray. They hate themselves and have no understanding (Proverbs 10:8, 17; 12:1; 15:12, 32; 19:20).

“Stern discipline awaits him who leaves the path;

he who hates correction will die.”

-Proverbs 15:10

Friendship

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:

If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to

help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one

keep warm alone? Though one be overpowered, two can defend

themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

-Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

                It is important to God that we, as believers, have good companions and friends here on earth. The Bible talks a lot about good friendships. Ecclesiastes teaches us that when someone has a companion, they can help bring each other up when one stumbles. They are there to help defend us and protect us. When you have more strings attached together, they will support a heavier weight. In the same way, people’s relationships with other people help make them stronger. But of course, a string can break no matter how strong it seems. When the strain becomes too much, someone can disappoint us. Only God will never disappoint us.

                There may be times where a friend might criticize something about you or something that you do. Don’t let this get between your friendships. They aren’t doing anything out of hate or harm. However, an enemy will never criticize you to your face. They deceive you and do nothing but flatter you. That is of no help to you. Flattery is nice but words of advice and guidance are nicer. A true friend of yours will tell you what you need to hear, even if it hurts, instead of flattering you all of the time. These “wounds” from a friend can also mean for them to rebuke or correct you when you have done something wrong. No one is perfect, but we usually want to make the best decisions for ourselves and those close to us. So sometimes it takes a true friend to tell us that we might be making the wrong decision and heading down the wrong path.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

-Proverbs 27:6

“Let a righteous man strike me-it is a kindness; let him rebuke me-it is

oil on my head. My head will not refuse it. Yet my

prayer is ever against the deeds of evildoers.”

-Psalm 141:5

“A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent

man overlooks an insult.”

-Proverbs 12:16

                Friends are supposed to look out for each other according to the Bible. God tells us numerous times that we are to help guide each other and lift each other up. We are to keep each other on the path of righteousness, even if painful words are to be said or heard. As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17).

“Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual

should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted.”

-Galatians 6:1

“The godly give good advice to their friends; the wicked lead them astray.”

-Proverbs 12:26

                Friends also can help cheer us up when we’re feeling depressed or frustrated. They are there for us when no one else is and help fill us with joy. The book of Proverbs is full of helpful advice when it comes to friendships and helps direct all of our relationships, whether it be a spouse or a friend or a parent.

“An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.”

-Proverbs 12:25

“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart and the pleasantness of

one’s friend springs from his earnest counsel.”

-Proverbs 27:9

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

-Proverbs 17:17

                There are also types of people that we need to look out for that God warns us not to have friendships with. He warns us in Proverbs 22:24 not to make friendships with angry people. You could become angry as well and they could end up saying harsh words to you if you accidentally anger them. You never know how they will react to things you say or do. Also, others might begin to think that you are angry with them. The Bible warns us not to make the mistake of associating with the wrong crowd.

“Bad company corrupts good character.”

-1 Corinthians 15:33

                Proverbs all tells us that we should not be friends with someone who likes to gossip. Someone who likes to gossip tells everyone your business and reveal s things that you don’t want others to know. You need to be cautious around them all of the time to make sure you don’t say something that could ruin you.

“A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret.”

-Proverbs 11:13

“A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.”

-Proverbs 16:28

“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion

of fools suffers harm.”

-Proverbs 13:20

                We should not let wealth or material items determine who we are friends with. Proverbs 14:20 and 19:4 informs us that wealthy people always have the most friends. If you have common sense then you will know that this is only because they have bought their friends. People try to get close to their wallets so that they will be showered with gifts. They think that a poor person is of lesser value and has nothing to offer. But they could have something greater to offer than money and gifts.

“…although saddened, we are always glad; we seem

poor, but we make many people rich; we seem to have nothing, yet

we really possess everything.”

-2 Corinthians 6:10

Jesus Christ demonstrates the ultimate friendship. John 15:12-14 says, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command.” As you can see from this verse, Jesus Christ is the perfect example of a true friend because He sacrificed Himself for us.

"Do not forsake your friend and the father of your friend..."

-Proverbs 27:10